War and Peace

So, a lot of people in the UK today are angry. They're angry because parliament have taken the decision to perform air strikes against ISIS in Syria. They're angry because it's using money that could be put towards good things within our own country like feeding and giving shelter to the homeless, like paying for more servicemen, nurses and doctors. They're angry because of all the innocent lives, labelled as "collateral damage", that are put at risk when these airstrikes are executed. They're angry because war only brings death, and they're longing for peace and justice.

As we look around us at our world today, many of us may be thinking, "What on earth is happening here?"

Death is everywhere. Injustice is everywhere. Lies are everywhere. Meaningless materialism is everywhere.
Destruction. Distraction. Deception.
World Economic Collapse. World War Three. One World Government. New World Order?

Conspiracy Theories...



In a world so seemlingly empty of hope at times, what are we to think? Do we just try to live our lives as good people, making what difference we can and continue on our way? Do we use what voice we have to shout through our social media accounts and through protests to proclaim what we see as right?
Do we lie awake at night just wondering at what it all means?

Many people, even within the Christian church sometimes, can be thought of as extreme if they follow Bible end-times prophecies. However, the Bible has a lot more to say about what exactly is going on in the world than you might have at first thought, and definitely a lot more relevant.

When asked by his disciples about the signs of his coming and of the close of the age, Jesus tells us in Matthew 24,

"And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom, and there will be famines and earthquakes in various places. All these are but the beginning of the birth pains." v6-8.

You can also find this passage in Mark 13 and Luke 21. Now, we know that there have been many, many wars since the time of Jesus, but does it not seem like there has been an increase in the last century especially? Wars, terrorism - it's no longer a question of two neighbouring nations against one another, it's gone global. Even taking into consideration the current issue of ISIS, already Russia, the US, China, Iran and now the UK are involved. Another interesting point here is that the word here translated as "nation" actually means ethnic group. Do we see any particular ethnic groups coming against one another today?

Since being in Ecuador I've felt a few earthquakes, not very large but enough to be felt. Below is a graph showing the global increase in earthquakes which excede magnitude 7 (in order to rule out an increase only due to improvments in global communication and an increase in the number of seismograph stations) between 1973 and 2006.

Taken from http://www.earth.webecs.co.uk/

The graph is fairly telling, and it doesn't even include the last 9 years. Closer to home, here in Quito we've been on alert for the last 4 months due to one of the most dangerous volcanoes in the world threatening to erupt after being dormant for more than 70 years...

One thing is certain, the number of natural disasters is on the increase. Coincidence?

Closer to home, the Bible also tells us what individual humans will be like in the last days:

"But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God" 

2 Timothy 3:1-4

Do we see these characteristics being exhibited by people around us today? Maybe, deep within our hearts, even ourselves?

Unfortunately, according to Jesus, these things are only the beginning. Things are going to get worse before they get better. Jesus says in verses 21 ans 22 of Matthew 24, 

"For then there will be a great tribulation, such as has not been from the beginning of the world until now, no, and never will be. And if those days had not been cut short, no human being would be saved."

So, is there no hope? Is real peace just a pipe dream? Are we just to watch the world spiral into destruction?

This fallen world will eventually come to an end. But our hope is that it doesn't have to be our end. 

It is right that we are angry and outraged at the injustice, violence and killing that happen all throughout the world. We are created in God's image and He, more than any one of us, hates those things, and that's why we as humans have this deep desire for justice and life somewhere within us. But we've been contaminated by sin, the very thing that causes us to practice injustice and malice ourselves. God hates sin and that's why He's going to bring an end to this world - but it's also why we have hope. 

God, because of His hate for sin and His love for people has given us an escape. He made a way to cleanse us and forgive us our sin so that He finds us just before His righteous judgement. He sent His Son into this world to take our sin upon himself and die for us and to rise again in victory, defeating sin. It is in him, Jesus of Nazareth, that we find our hope.

One day, after this earth is completey destroyed and sin and evil have been dealt with and erradicated forever, God is going to start again with those who want to, with those who have denounced their sin and trusted in Jesus. There will be a new heaven and earth, beautiful and pure, free from pain, suffering and injustice where Jesus reigns as Eternal King.

The question is, do we hate injustice enough to recognise it within ourselves, repent from our sin and humble ourselves before God to accept an eternity with Him in His paradise, that our heart of hearts so desperately longs for... or would we rather believe ourselves righteous, reject God and eventually be judged alongside the rest of this world so full of evil?

There is hope to be had this Christmas, and his name is Jesus. He was promised from the very beginning, when sin first entered this world, and he was prophecied through the ages.

"But you, O Bethlehem Ephrathah, who are too little to be among the clans of Judah, from you shall come forth for me whose coming forth is from of old, one who is to be ruler in Israel from ancient days... And he shall stand and shepherd his flock in the strength of the LORD, in the majesty of the name of the LORD his God, to the ends of the earth. And they shall dwell secure, for now he shall be great and he shall be their peace."

Micah 5:1, 4-5 (700-750 years before Christ)

And now peace is yours to claim through him if you should so choose to.

You may believe all this Bible prophecy stuff is a load of nonsense, coincidence or plain lies - that's your decision - however should you be interested in investigating a little more about the subject, (I have barely even scratched the surface in this post) I would recommend The Daniel Project, a secular documentary investigating the fulfilment and potential fulfilment of certain Bible end-time prophecies, presented by actor, voice-over artist and self-confessed athiest Jeremy Hitchen. You can find out more and buy the DVD on their website, www.thedanielprojectmovie.com

"Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” 

Revelation 21:1-4

"Then the angel showed me the river of the water of life, bright as crystal, flowing from the throne of God and of the Lamb through the middle of the street of the city; also, on either side of the river, the tree of life with its twelve kinds of fruit, yielding its fruit each month. The leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations. No longer will there be anything accursed, but the throne of God and of the Lamb will be in it, and his servants will worship him. They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. And night will be no more. They will need no light of lamp or sun, for the Lord God will be their light, and they will reign forever and ever. And he said to me, “These words are trustworthy and true. And the Lord, the God of the spirits of the prophets, has sent his angel to show his servants what must soon take place. And behold, I am coming soon. Blessed is the one who keeps the words of the prophecy of this book.”

Revelation 22:1-7

"And he said to me, “Do not seal up the words of the prophecy of this book, for the time is near. Let the evildoer still do evil, and the filthy still be filthy, and the righteous still do right, and the holy still be holy."

"Behold, I am coming soon, bringing my recompense with me, to repay each one for what he has done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last, the beginning and the end.” Blessed are those who wash their robes, so that they may have the right to the tree of life and that they may enter the city by the gates. Outside are the dogs and sorcerers and the sexually immoral and murderers and idolaters, and everyone who loves and practices falsehood. “I, Jesus, have sent my angel to testify to you about these things for the churches. I am the root and the descendant of David, the bright morning star.” The Spirit and the Bride say, “Come.” And let the one who hears say, “Come.” And let the one who is thirsty come; let the one who desires take the water of life without price."

Revelation 22:10-17

The Most Important Yes

So a couple of days ago, it was our first  "engagement" anniversary - it was a whole year ago that Josias got down on one knee, on the equator, and asked me to marry him.
I shared the memory on my facebook page and commented that it was the "second most important yes of my life". However, after posting it I began to think and I realised that, even though Sunday the 16th of November 2014 was the day I officially said yes to spending the rest of my life with this man, it wasn't when my heart said yes.

My heart said yes 5 months before that.

5 months exactly before I had the ring on my finger, the 16th of June, Josias and I were sitting in Parque Carolina in Quito (the largest man-made park in South America apparently) and Josias told me that "he liked me a lot" and we began talking about the possibility of a future together. For some time before that, I had prayed and committed myself to not go out with anyone who wasn't my future husband, and so for me, saying yes now was saying yes to a whole lot more than just casual dating. As much as I was very much attracted to him (an attraction I began trying to ignore since we met, on my 21st birthday in May), and knew that he was the type of godly man that I wanted to marry, I was scared.

I had only been in Ecuador 4 months, I was here as a missionary with a lot of people to answer to and be held accountable to, I had consciously prepared myself for being single and not worrying about men for the 2 years I was going to be serving and had previously decided that communication in marriage was difficult enough without adding in cultural and linguistic barriers, so my preference was to marry somebody from my own country. That's what my brain was yelling at me anyway.

However, amidst all the doubt and fear (of which there were a lot), as I looked at this man who I'd only really known for less than two weeks, in my heart there was a quiet but persistant peace, and as the day went on, that quiet peace began to drown out all the panicky doubts running about in my conscious. I began to feel that, despite being on different continents and living in totally different worlds until 4 months ago, I knew this young man already; my heart recognised him from my many prayers and heartfelt longings from years before.

So the next day, on a bus to Latacunga to go and meet up with a missions team from the States, when Josias asked me for the second time if I would be his girlfriend, despite the continued presence of incertainty and fear, knowing that I would in reality be saying yes to much more than that, that persistant peace somehow fought its way quietly through to the surface and I said the second most important yes of my life.

When I look back at it now, knowing how stupidly in love I am with Josias and feeling absolutely certain that he is the best man for me, alongside whom to live this adventure of serving God together, I also see how easily I could have missed it all. If I'd let my common sense and doubts overtake that quiet peace and direction from the Lord, I would have missed out on the second biggest blessing of my life.

As I've been thinking about this "second most important yes", it has also reminded me of the most important yes of my life, a yes to God; a yes to repentance and humility in accepting that without Him I am a hopeless sinner in need of grace; a yes to Jesus and the life He has to offer me; a yes to a life lived only for Him (I'm still working on that some days!). As I've been thinking, I've realised that my two most important yeses actually have a lot more in common that I might have first believed.

In the same way I had to take a leap of faith in saying yes to Josias, saying yes to God also requires that same leap. In the same way I was bombarded with doubt and fear about what may happen if I potentially said yes, there are also doubts and fears that can try to grip our hearts as we contemplate a life with God. However, in the same way that there existed that small and almost silent peace in my heart that told me saying yes was the right decision, so also God softens our hearts to hear Him and His Holy Spirit quietly tells us that it is all true: that we really are hopeless sinners who one day will face eternal judgement for our bad decisions and that there really is a loving God who sent His Son to die in our place and who rose from the dead, forever defeating sin and death. And in the same way my heart recognised Josias as the man I had prayed for and longed to be with, so too our hearts recognise the loving Creator God who made and designed us to live in divine fellowship with Him.

However, just like I would have missed out on this wonderful marriage with Josias if I had given into those doubts, so we too miss out on the greatest relationship we could ever have if we allow our human thoughts and doubts to overcome that small, still voice of the Holy Spirit and cause us to reject what our hearts know to be the Truth.

But if we do take that leap of faith, and we say the Eternal Yes to God's proposal, we land on a small and narrow path on which we find love, intimacy, acceptance, forgiveness and the One whom our soul loves, and as we get to know Him more and more, as we see His faithfulness at work in our lives every day, the stronger that faith becomes and the doubts slowly fade away into nothingness. One day, when the church, His bride, is seated at the marriage feast of the lamb, we will be living no longer by faith but by sight.

Now that I'm married to Josias, I can't believe I ever doubted that he wasn't the one for me. Sure, the Ecua-Wife Life isn't always simple or easy, and I had to make a lot of difficult and some extreme decisions to get here but I would never, ever give up my marriage with Josias. One day, when Christ comes back or I'm taken to be with Him in glory, that's exactly what it will be like, only infintely more, and I'll be infintely thankful to God who helped me to say the most important yes.

*This is a double post of something I wrote for my other blog "The Ecua-Wife Life" which focuses on my life in Ecuador and my own personal thoughts and things that God is teaching me. If you would like to read more, you can access it via the tab at the top of the page.

The Minions

So a few weeks ago, my husband and I (when does it stop feeling amazing every time I get to say that?!) took an impromptu trip to the cinema and, being the two adult-sized children that we are, we decided to go and see Minions.

Now, before I say anything else, I just want to express how hilarious this film is and if you haven't seen it then you should. We had a really great time and laughed the whole way through. Something else interesting about the minions, before I move on, is that watching the film as someone who is bilingual is really interesting and funny because it turns out- after researching a bit before writing this- the minion language, or "minionese" is a hilarious mix of lots of different languages, so when we rewatched the film again last week but this time in English, it was really funny to still hear the minions saying things in Spanish. 

(P.S Check this out. Have fun and you're welcome: http://minionstranslator.com/ )

Now to the point!

If you haven't seen the film yet, the whole plot is built around the fact that, from the beginning of their existence, the minions have always had a bad-guy boss, and their whole life purpose is built around this need to serve a boss. However, managing not to kill their boss off proves a challenge and, after one of these unfortunate incidents, the minions find refuge in a giant ice cave and for a while enjoy safety and happiness inside the cave having all sorts of fun for themselves. But the fun only lasts so long and soon the minions find themselves depressed and unfulfilled. 

Cue our hero: Kevin. 

Kevin courageously comes up with a plan, to leave the cave in search of a boss and not return until he has done so. And I won't give away anymore for those of you who haven't seen it!

After watching it the second time, I realised that we men and women aren't actually that different from the minions. We too, whether you've realised it or not, have this in-built purpose in our make up. As human beings, we feel this need to serve something or someone, to dedicate ourselves to a particular cause; to find purpose for our lives. Whether it's religion, charity work, a football team, a job, furthering our education, family, children, finding love... the list goes on. 

But the point is none of these things really bring us true, lasting fulfilment. There is always something missing.

We're always telling ourselves, "I'll be happy when...":

I'll be happy once I'm popular; I'll be happy when I'm studying what I want to at university; I'll be happy when I have my dream job; I'll be happy when I find the love of my dreams; I'll be happy once we have our dream house; I'll be happy when we have children; I'll be happy when we have a better car; I'll be happy when I get a raise at work; I'll be happy once this problem goes away; I'll be happy after the divorce; I'll be happy when I can retire; I'll be happy when... I'll be happy when...

And it's because we know that there's something missing. Except we look for it and think we'll find it in all the wrong places.

God created us with the purpose of being in relationship with Him and bringing glory to Him. It's at the very core of every one of us. Except that, because of sin, we are now incapable of fulfilling that purpose. Sin is everything that goes against the very character of who God is, and so because we have become sinful beings, compelled to do all of things that offend God and go against His character and His design for us and this world, we are separated and cut off  from God, unable to either to be in relationship with Him or live in a way that pleases and glorifies Him. 

We are no longer able to fulfill the very purpose for which we were created. 

And so we go off, searching for things in which we'll find fulfilment and maybe we do find it- for a while. But sooner or later we discover that these things or people don't live up to the high expectations that we had and, like the minions when they tried living outside of their purpose, we find ourselves disappointed and unsatisfied. But it wasn't meant to be this way.

God loves us so much, and so longs for us to be able to fulfil that original purpose, to be in a loving Father-Child relationship with Him, that He formed the most scandelous and epic rescue plan to save us from our sin and build a bridge over the deep chasm that sin created between us and enable us to fulfil our true purpose: God Himself, the Almighty Self-Sufficient Creator of all the vast universe, humbled Himself to come to earth as a man to serve us, imperfect, fickle and hopelessly helpless human beings, and to offer Himself as a perfect sacrifice in our place and pay the price that our sin demands: death. It was a plan so shocking, that even the Jewish Religous leaders, seeing it all happen before their eyes, didn't believe it, even though their scriptures predicted every single detail of it! Even when Jesus rose from the dead, defeating sin and death once and for all, they weren't willing to believe it. 

All we need to do, is want it. You see, the religous leaders didn't want to believe it, because believing it would mean leaving all they knew behind, including their self-made God of religion and rules and the power that came with it. They had become "minions" to their selfishness and desire for power. Namely, their sin. And they weren't willing to leave it behind to believe in Jesus, their Saviour. 

We have that same choice today.

God has made a way for us to be free, to live life in abundance, in a loving, fulfilling, satisfying relationship with Him, but in order to have that we must choose to leave our old life, our old gods, and our old boss- sin- behind. You see, the Bible talks about how we make ourselves slaves (or "minions" in this case) of the one whom we obey. We have the choice of being minions to sin, which leads to death, or of being minions to obedience which leads to righteousness. You cannot choose both. Jesus died and rose again to free us from sin, and so to accept Him we must want to be saved from that sin. Relating it to the minions, they had to want to leave the cave; they couldn't serve the new boss that Kevin was going to find unless they left the cave first. 

This "cave-life", living as minions to our own desires and sin doesn't offer us satisfaction. It's not what we were designed and created for. We were designed to serve and bring glory to the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY, Creator of heaven and earth, the God who is love, grace and mercy, ready to receive whoever would call upon the name of Jesus for salvation. It might feel good now, in the temporary, but all sin does is entrap us, deceive us, destroy our lives and rob us of the joy that we could have in Christ Jesus.

The time is now. None of us knows when our time here is up. Don't leave this offer of salvation and life on the table. 

To whoever is reading this, wherever you are in this world, whatever situation you find yourself in, God is good and He loves you. When you were His enemy, slandering Him, rejecting Him, sinning against Him, in the very worst moment of your life He loved you enough to die for you. Don't just walk away from that.

Also, I love you too. And I love my God. It is because of that, because of the relationship that I have with Him that I can love others too, and need to share what He has done in me and declare His gospel- the Good News- that there is a God who, despite our rejection of Him, loves us and made a way for us to be with Him forever.

Passages of the Bible referred to (extra reading!):

Romans, chapter 6, verses 15-23

Romans, chapter 5, verses 6-11

The Gospel of John, chapter 10, verses 9-10

The Gospel of John, chapter 1, verses 9-13

Isaiah, chapter 55, verses 6-7

In This Way

The date today is the 16th of March, "John 3:16 day", and all over the world Christians are sharing one of the most well known bible verses in whatever way they can.

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life."

John 3:16

The verse explains how God sent His son, Jesus, into the world in order that we may have eternal life with Him. All because of His love for us. But there are two ways that the first phrase, "For God so loved the world," can be interpreted. 

In modern english, the most natural way we read it is in the sense of, "God loved the world so much that..."

The second way to read it is, "For God loved the world in this way..."

For a large number of people the first interpretation of the phrase is, understandably, very important to them. It is a life-changing thing to understand the immensity of God's love for us, it brings us freedom and peace. The second interpretation perhaps seems less interesting or meaningful in comparison.

In the world today, we have a very confused and warped sense of what love is; in general we think of love as a feeling, something we can experience, something that we can lose...

We don't understand what real, pure love is. That is, the perfect love with which God loves.

I want to suggest to you that the second interpretation is the more accurate, and the most meaningful for our lives. For us, we think of love as something that has varying levels, and it's for this reason we have the phrase, "I love you so much", and it's because, as humans, by ourselves we're not capable of real love. 

God does not love in certain amounts, it's not possible. He just loves. It's a constant, undaunted and unconditional love that can never and never will change. God didn't send His son to die for our sins because He loved us "this amount", He sent Jesus to sacrifice himself because He loves us completely, fully and perfectly and He doesn't want us to perish, to spend eternity without Him. To think that God loved us "so much" is not to understand what His love, real love, really is- but there's a reason we don't understand.

 

How does the love we know in our world demonstrate itself? Today, generally 40-50% of marriages end in divorce. We live in a world where, if the feeling of love isn't there, you are within your right to give up on a relationship, withdraw your commitment, or ignore the right thing to do. We have bought into this phoney idea of love, a cheap imitation of the real thing. We confuse romantic love with lust, and love in general with something that should always be self-satisfying; if it doesn't benefit you, if it isn't the best thing for you, then don't do it. Think of yourself, it's your right. And then we're surprised when it doesn't seem to be all that we thought it would be, all that we know love should be.

The opposite of love is not hate, it is selfishness. We are capable of love, we do love, but it is always a constant battle between that real love and our love of ourselves, our naturally selfish nature. And without God, it's a losing battle.

By sacrificing Himself, God shows us what real love is. He demonstrated His love for us by choosing to become a human, leaving His perfect and glorious place in Heaven to live among us, facing the same battles, struggles and temptations, in the same weakness. He proved His love for us by overcoming sin through living the perfect life, despite the struggles, and then by dying in your place. 

He died for you, knowing that you didn't love or even like Him, nevermind acknowledge Him as God. He died for you, even though He knew all of the times you would reject and turn your back on Him. He died for you, even though He knew you may never even accept Him or His gift of eternal life and salvation from sin and its consequences.

Real love doesn't require anything in return and it is not self-serving. Love is always a choice. To show us His love, Jesus took our well-deserved punishment upon himself, dying on a cross, and then God raised Him from the dead, securing victory over sin and death, so that we could live a life of freedom in that victory. It's a love that none of us deserve.

Who has ever loved us in this way before? Who else could ever love us this way? God has loved us completely, and has displayed that love for all to see and believe in through His son, Jesus Christ. Not only do we receive eternal life but we are free from our slavery to sin; we are able to live in a way that is not only pleasing to God but is completely satsisfying for us. We have a restored relationship with our Father and Creator, which brings us a peace that passes understanding and overcomes the restraints of life's circumstances.

His gift of love and forgiveness is there for you to take, you only need believe and accept it.

Gambling your life away?

Gambling is a very familiar part of our culture here in the UK, and has been for decades, whether it's betting on a horse to win a race or on a football score, or simply buying a lottery ticket or a scratch card. According to the British Gambling Prevalence Survey 2010, 73% of all adults (16+) had participated in some form of gambling over the past year. That's around 35.5 million people. So, how much are these people spending exactly? Between October 2011 and September 2012, the British gambling industry generated a gross gambling yield of £6.2 billion. That's a lot.

Gambling Industry Statistics Apr'09- Sept'12, Gambling Commission

And this is how it's being spent.


 The Oxford English Dictionary defines the verb to gamble as such:
1. to play games of chance for money; bet
2. to take risky action in the hope of a desired result

Recently, I've been thinking a lot about betting and gambling, and about how they play a bigger role in all of our lives than we realise. I don't mean the examples I've just been giving, but the very concept of gambling itself: investing in something whilst believing or hoping that it will work out in our favour. This idea transfers to so many areas of our lives, from sending that "risky text" to the person we've fancied for months to buying shares in a company.

   But we don't make these sorts of decisions based on nothing, do we? In most betting scenarios we first look at the evidence before investing: which team has been playing better recently?; which horse has been running well?; what are the experts saying?; has the person of our affections given any signs they feel similarly?; does the company have a good record and a prosperous looking future?

Let me ask you something-

"What is the maximum you would be willing to bet on something you believed in?"

This answer to this question, of course, depends on a couple of factors.

• How important the issue/belief involved is; what impact it will have on your life
• How certain you are of the outcome; how much evidence there is in favour of the outcome

Take a couple of seconds to think about it.

So now let me ask you another question-

 "What would you be willing to bet on your beliefs about God being true?"

Let's go through our points.

How Important is the Issue of God's existence?

If God doesn't exist, then we can live our lives as we please, accountable to no one except perhaps to those in power. It also means that there is no purpose in anything we do except for our own happiness and the happiness of those around us, and one day we will just die and cease to exist. Really, the non-existence of God would have zero impact on us at all as whether we believe in him or not, we will all share the same fate and die. The End.

  But what if He does?

  If God does exist, then what we believe regarding Him is intrinsically important. If God does exist, then we are ultimately accountable to Him for our actions and come under His Authority and Justice. If God does exist, life is no longer just about making the most of it, having a good time and then dying. If God does exist then what we believe about Him does matter as we come face to face with eternity and where we will spend it. If God does exist, then we will either spend eternity with Him, in Paradise, or without Him, in a place called Hell. 

On one side, it matters nothing at all. On the other, it means absolutely everything. Are you willing to bet on it meaning nothing or everything?

What Evidence is there for the Existence and Non-Existence of God?

I'm struggling with how to put this in a way that is fair, but my own reasoning and logic tells me that there is no evidence for the non-existence of God, but only evidence against the existence of God (think about it, there is a difference), and so that is the manner in which I'm going to approach this.

  One strong opposition people have to the existence of God is the existence of pain and suffering at the hands of evil. However, if we think back to the consequences of there being no God, then we can all do what we want and we're not accountable to anyone. If this is the case, then why do we care so much about evil and injustice in the world? If there is no God then there is no ultimate justice and we can all do what we want without any ultimate consequences, and that's what we want to believe until we don't like what some people choose to do with that. 

"How could God allow such evil in the world?"

The evil in this world is generated from the attitude born out of a disbelief in God in the first place! People can choose to do what they want to and what makes them happy, consequently hurting other people: God doesn't exist, I don't have to answer to anyone, I can just do what I want for the sake of my own happiness and then die, leaving behind the mess I've made in my path to "happiness". God, out of His love, allowed us to have our own minds, to make our own choices, to decide whether we wanted Him or not and evil is what comes from our decision to reject Him. 

  One of the more recent things that is used as evidence against the existence of God is science. I can already tell you that I'm not going to give you a very good "argument" here, simply because I do not understand the logic of the idea that because we know more about how the world works it proves it developed on its own. I've studied and enjoyed learning about chemistry for the past 7 years now, and I think the primary reason I find it so interesting is because I enjoy finding out how things work, and learning just how utterly complex and amazing our world is. For me, as I have learnt more and more in the subject of chemistry, and the things I learn have become increasingly difficult, I am only further persuaded that our universe must  have been designed and created. Logic tells me that finding out that something is infinitely more complex than we previously understood, takes us further away from being able to say that it all happened on its own! As far as the big bang theory and evolutionary theory go- so what? In terms of God existing, they make no difference; it doesn't matter how you believe our world came into being and developed, you can't disprove or find evidence against God having been the One to have caused it all.

  I'm sure there are more arguments for there being evidence against God's existence, but the purpose of this blog is just to give you an idea. If you have anything specific yourself that you'd like to ask me about, don't hesitate to get in touch and I'll do the best I can to give you an answer.

So, on the flip side, what evidence is there to suggest God does exist? Well, I could go on forever, but that's not the point of this blog!

I could start by using the reverse of my last point: look at the world around you, you don't need to have any scientific knowledge to look at our planet and see that it is 

amazing! Look at all the different types of trees and flowers, look at all the crazy amazing looking fish in the sea, look at the colours EVERYWHERE! The birds in the sky, the terrifyingly terrific wildlife of Africa, the giant immovable mountains, and the superbly small yet amazing insect world.

Look at the sky above you, the wonderfully fluffy clouds and beautiful blue sky, thundering black clouds fit to burst with water droplets, flashes of lightening that light up the entire sky. Look at the stars and the moon. What a different world it would be without them! Feel the involuntary sense of smallness as you gaze out into the universe and are dazzled by its beauty and enormity.

Look at yourself. You are amazing. You can see, you can hear, you can taste, you can smell, and you can feel, that is amazing in itself. You started off life as two cells! And look at you now! And you're intelligent, too, more intelligent than any other creature on the planet. But you're still more than that. You're not just a body and a mind, an intelligent machine meandering through life; you are a person. Think over your life, think of the pain and the heartache, think of that overwhelming joy and happiness, think of how much you love/d that person, think of that unexplainable feeling of emptiness- are you really just a well assembled piece of matter?

Look at Jesus. (I've gone over this in a previous blog, but I'll just give you a wee bit to give you the idea in context). You cannot disprove Jesus, he was a real person in history. His life and death were prophesied hundreds and thousands of years before he was even born. He lived a perfect life, he was beaten and nailed to a cross of wood, and he died. And then three days later the tomb was empty. Hundreds of people testify the risen Jesus, thousands of people at a time accept him as their saviour and are baptised in his name, his disciples go out into Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria and to the ends of the earth proclaiming Jesus as the Son of God who could save from sin and more and more people became followers of Jesus Christ. They were persecuted, beaten and killed but still would not reject their Jesus.

They invested everything they had for what they believed about God. 

They knew it was the most important thing in life.

And they knew what they believed was True.

Now let me ask you again, 

"What would you be willing to bet on your beliefs about God being true?"

Believe it or not, you are betting with exactly what persecuted Christians all over the world have been for 2000 years:

  your life.

Whether you like it or not, your whole life is at stake here. And I don't just mean your life here on earth, either. You can't afford to dilly dally around it or be agnostic- Your eternity hangs in the balance! 

It's your choice to believe that God doesn't exist, but...

are you ready to bet your life on it?

'Cause you better be.

BIG NEWS.

So, where do I even begin?

This last year for me has been huge and God has done more in my life than I could have even hoped or dreamt for. A year ago, I had just come back from my orientation weekend for going to Cuba where I met my team for the very first time and learnt more about where I was going, and I was buzzing. I had no idea that a year later I would be leaving my chemistry degree behind and be preparing to return to Cuba as a missionary for 2 years, as of January 2014.

  I told you it was big.

After returning from Cuba last year, I knew that I had been called to serve God as a missionary in Central America. From before I even left, I knew I wouldn't be wanting to come home; every day I was in Cuba I counted the days I had left to cherish in this amazing country with these precious people. I was right, when it was time to go home I didn't want to leave; I had come to feel so at home and I wasn't ready to leave it all behind. I had discovered what I was meant to do, where my gifts were meant to be used; university wasn't even worth the comparison.

  Before I went back to university, my Mum and Step-Dad had one of their quarterly bible teaching days in our village community centre. Our former pastor was speaking about two of the tribes of Israel who decided they didn't want to live across the Jordan River in The Promised Land but instead settle in a place called Gilead because they thought the land was better for them. The story thus far is that the Israelites have just spent 40 years in the desert after being freed from slavery in Egypt, and are preparing to finally enter The Promised Land. Our pastor was saying that often as christians we decide what is best for us and how far we want to go, and by doing this we try to put limits on what God can do in our lives and where He can take us; we get so satisfied with where we are that we're not willing to move on, whether we've been told that the new is better or not. I don't know if he said anything specific that really hit me, but while he was speaking I felt God saying to me that I now knew that I had been called and it wasn't my decision when that calling took effect, and I wasn't to finish my time at university. I immediately spoke to my Mum about it but, as all mothers I'm sure would, she told me not to be silly and that it was probably just nerves about going into 2nd year and moving into a flat. This seemed very plausible and so I tried to put it to the back of my mind and not think about it anymore.

  When I did get back to uni, something didn't seem to fit anymore. I had less work to do than I had in first year, but for some reason (but one I probably knew deep down) I just couldn't focus. I got everything done but I was never happy with it. The leaving uni issue was still at the back of my mind and I couldn't help but think of it from time to time, but really, what was the probability of God really asking me to do that? Nobody leaves uni to pursue missionary work, and if they did they would either look foolish or lazy and just looking for an excuse. I didn't want to appear either of those things.

  In November, I was down south (dear Englanders, this is what we Scots call anything south of The Border) for a debrief weekend with Latin Link- the organisation I had gone to Cuba with. It was a bittersweet weekend in some ways; it was lovely to remember and laugh about our time spent in Cuba but unfortunately only half of the Cublahs (nickname for our team) were able to make it. All weekend there were different talks on various things, naturally including ones on further mission work and investigating a calling to mission work. I decided I needed to take some time out to pray- I couldn't ignore these feelings any longer. After I finished praying, I felt the Lord tell me to read my devotion for that day:

"After Sanctification, it is difficult to state what your purpose in life is, because God has moved you into His purpose through the Holy Spirit. He is using you now for His purposes throughout the world as He used His son for the purpose of our salvation. If you seek great things for yourself, thinking "God has called me for this and for that," you barricade God from using you. As long as you maintain your own personal interests and ambitions, you cannot be completely aligned or identified with God's interests. This can only be accomplished by giving up all of your personal plans once and for all, and by allowing God to take you directly into His purpose for the world. Your understanding of your ways must also be surrendered, because they are now the ways of the Lord.

  I must learn that the purpose of my life belongs to God, not me. God is using me from His great personal perspective, and all He asks of me is that I trust Him. I should never say, "Lord, this causes me such heartache." To talk that way makes me a stumbling block. When I stop telling God what I want, He can freely work His will in me without any hindrance. He can crush me, exalt me, or do anything else he chooses. He simply asks me to have absolute faith in Him and His goodness. Self-pity is of the devil, and if I wallow in it I cannot be used by God for His purpose in the world. Doing this creates for me my own cozy "world within the world," and God will not be allowed to move me from it because of my fear of being "frost-bitten." "

-November 10, My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers

I still wasn't certain if that was in context of leaving university but I knew I needed to start listening. I felt God say to me very clearly that I wasn't to seek the counsel of men or their advice, but I was to ask for prayer instead as I sought His will. I did this by firstly emailing my pastor at and then also emailing my grandparents who are missionaries in Thailand. My Grandpa got back to me and spoke to me about how God called him to be a missionary when he was 19 also, but he was in the army at the time and so it was right that he finish serving there first. This was in line with the thoughts of all my family members who knew at this time, and it felt like I was battling against them to make them believe I really felt God was saying this to me and it wasn't just some phase I was going through of wanting to leave university.
  Over the next month or so I tried not to think too much about it as I went through my semester 1 exams, as I'm pretty sure Christmas exams drive many people to consider leaving university under normal circumstances. However, I couldn't help but continue examining the situation and trying to discern whether the things that were happening were God continuing to speak to me or whether it was my overactive imagination trying to provide its own confirmation. By the time it came to the end of exams and eventually New Year, I decided that there had been too many small "coincidences" and times I'd felt God speaking to me for me to not come to the conclusion that He was asking me to leave university. 
  I told this to my Mum but she told me that she wasn't going to be on board with it until God had given me solid confirmation from the Bible. I wasn't too impressed with this firstly because I'd never asked for nor received this type of confirmation before and secondly, because by this point I was so concerned about doing what God wanted me to do I didn't trust myself to discern whether it was Him speaking to me or just my mind making things up. However, later that week I felt the Lord say to me that if I asked Him for confirmation from the Bible then He would give it to me. And so I prayed and told my Heavenly Father that I wanted to do what He wanted me to do, whatever that was, and asked Him to give me clear confirmation from His Word and that I would be in no doubt as to whether it was from Him or not.
  The next morning (it was a Sunday) we had a guest speaker at our church and I felt very clearly that God was going to speak to me. The message that morning was on Hebrews 11:8-18. 

"By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to a place that he was to receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going." Hebrews 11:8 

I knew in the moment I opened up my bible and saw that verse that it was the confirmation I had asked for the night before. However, just to be absolutely certain, I asked the Lord that Mum would recognise that too without me having to say anything to her. And she did. It also turned out that when Mum and Don had been out at a fellowship evening the night before they had shared something of my situation and they too had prayed that God would give me clear confirmation!
  That was when I officially made the decision that I wouldn't be returning to university after the Summer. Although I guessed my leaving would probably be to make way for something to do with my calling to be a missionary, at the time I had no idea what God had planned for me instead of continuing my degree. 
  Over the couple of months following, God continued leading and guiding me in gradual steps until I realised that what He had planned for me was what I hadn't realised I'd wanted all along: to return to Cuba on an individual placement with Latin Link.

2 years ago, I had just left school and was planning on obtaining an MChem from Edinburgh University and christian mission wasn't even close to being on my mind. Now I am leaving my former ambitions behind me and pursuing the dreams I didn't even realise that I had. Although there are sacrifices involved with working as a missionary overseas, they are nothing in comparison to the joy that is mine through doing what I know God has called me to and the blessing I have known and will know as a result of putting faith in the Faithful God. 

"Jesus said, "Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel, who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life..." Mark 10:29-30

When we surrender everything we have to Jesus, He can and will do amazing things with what we give Him. It's never easy but it is always worth it. God knows our hearts way better than we do, and He loves us more than we will ever be able to understand, comprehend or appreciate- He is always worthy of everything we have to give to Him and He is able to do waaaay more with it than we can! Surrendering to God is like making an investment where we get infinitely more back from it than we put in. I could never have imagined where God would take me, but when I look back at my life I can see that He has been preparing me for it all this time. I want to leave you with this scripture which I have really come to understand and know in my heart through all of this.

"But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith- that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead." Philippians 3:7-11

Nothing is of greater worth than knowing Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour, and there is nothing more rewarding than putting your faith in Him and giving Him all you have to give. Put everything in His hands and watch the blessings flow.

My Fathers

In the UK, this Sunday the 16th of June is Father's Day. All over the country people will be worrying about what presents to buy, whether to go for a funny or emotional card and other Father's Day related concerns.

Those of you who read my blog as my friends will know my story, but there will be those of you out there who don't. It's not the first time I've taken this holiday as an opportunity to share my story, but I rejoice that everytime I share it the truth in it is no less valid.

I was born the second child in what was to be a family of four children, and grew up in a loving and God-centered environment. If you were able to watch my childhood, you may say that my parents were strict and perhaps over-protective- I probably thought it at the time as well- but looking back I can see that my parents gave me the best gift they possibly could have: they brought me up to know God and His love for me, and to love Him in return. Although I officially "prayed the prayer" when I was five years old, I really feel that God was all over my life from the very beginning- there has been no point in my life where I have known what it is to live without God's presence in my life. From a young age I had a very intimate relationship with God and trusted Him in everything; I was in no way a perfect child, but God gave me the gift of a hunger for His word and a thirst for His truth.

  Not only did I have a close relationship with my Heavenly Father, but I had one with my Earthly Dad, too. I was a real Daddy's girl, and there was nothing I cherished more than a good snuggle in the protective arms of my Dad. I know that a lot of girls will be able to testify to the fact that there are few things more truly comforting than a man, whether a father figure or boyfriend/husband, holding you and knowing that the care they have for you is real and that they will look after and protect you. One of the memories of my Dad that sticks out the most for me is a Sunday afternoon when I was 8 or 9. By this point, my parents were actually separated and we spent every second weekend at my grandparent's house around the corner where my Dad was living, and so on this weekend it was my Dad who took us to church. On this particular Sunday, I began feeling ill during church and so afterwards my Dad arranged for my silblings to be taken to my Mum's parents for lunch as usual while he took me home and looked after me. We got home, and I spent the afternoon wrapped up in a woolen blanket on the couch cuddling my Daddy as we watched the original Parent Trap movie. I felt loved and cared for, and being in a family of four kids, it was really special to spend this time just the two of us.
  At around 11 o'clock on Wednesday the 8th of October 2003, I was playing my flute in front of an audience for the first time. Little did I know that at the same time, my Dad had been taken home and was now worshipping at the feet of our Lord and Saviour in Glory. For a lot of 10 year olds, that day could have been described as the worst day of their lives; the most traumatic experience they could have gone through. But amidst the grief and the shock surrounding me at that time, the strongest thing that I felt was not loss, nor anger or confusion over why this had happened, why now, why my Dad. Instead it was a supreme peace, not generated from lack of chaos or from positive circumstances but from the knowledge that my Heavenly Father, Creator God, the King of the Heavens, was still in control. He loved me, He knew me better than anyone ever could, and He was going to take care of me and my family.

Isaiah 41:10

And He absolutely has. I don't want you to think that it has been easy and I'm just some crazy person who obviously has no emotion; I'm not. Over the last 9 and a half years there have been tears and there has been heartache, times where I would do anything just to spend a little more time with my Dad, to know that he loves me and is proud of me. But more than all of that, my God has been faithful! He has shown me that He is worth every ounce of my trust and that He will never ever fail me.
  Some people assume that faith is blind, built on nothing and merited by nothing. When I look at my life, my faith is able to grow because I can see the trail of evidence for God's faithfulness (never mind His existance!) all throughout my life! Though the death of my Dad will never, and should never, be thought of as a positive thing, God has used it and continues to use it as a source of blessing in my life and I know, even though one could be forgiven for thinking at the time that God must have lost control for my Dad to have died or He couldn't have loved me enough, that my God is so much BIGGER than all of these things! He can take the horrible, broken things of this life and turn them into something beautiful that is used for His glory! Just look at me: I am a broken and sinful person and, if left to my own strength and decisions, would make a terrible mess, but through God I can live in a way that is beautiful and honours Him. I still make mistakes, but my life is so much better when I surrender to God and admit that I can't do it on my own, believing and leaning on the promises that He makes to me in His Word.
  Although the loss of my Dad has left a part of me broken and weak, my God has not failed to care and cherish me in a way that only He is capable of doing. God doesn't let things happen in our lives to just expect us to live like everyone else. God knows the areas in which I need special care, and by His love and grace He fulfills me.

There may be some of you reading this who won't be celebrating your dad this Sunday, for whatever reason. Maybe you will be, but deep down you sense that there is something missing, there may be a need in your life you feel your father should but doesn't fulfil. Maybe your relationship with your dad is broken. I know the pain that the non-existance of a father or father figure can cause and the way that it can shape you as a person, and I often wonder where I would be if it were not for the grace of my Heavenly Father. I present my life before you today as evidence that there is a Father who never fails, whose love transcends all things and whose grace, power and strength are sufficient for you. All you need do is come to Him, brokenness, heartache and emotional baggage included. He can take it all. That's what God did when Jesus died on that cross! He took your sin, your pain, your weakness, your failures, everything that would ever hold you back from knowing Him and He nailed it to a cross. Jesus took all of that for you. He's just waiting for you to accept it.